Apr. 2nd, 2015

sophocles: (Rennie)
Day three.
 I now offically wonder when I'm going to stop counting.

Getting up out of bed, and intending to do stuff is easier.

I'm going through old photographs. I stumbled on some video diaries from when I really wanted to be Ze Frank- or John Green really, but I didn't know who that was yet. The material is pretty good. The editing is okay. The delivery is better that I expected- at least with the one video I liked. At least one of the others reminded me that it's a good idea that I'm doing this whole adderal thing.

And then there are the pictures. When I first got a camera phone, I was oddly if only sporatically obessed with photographing things. Kinda like hipsters taking pictures of their food, but with everything. I still do this from time to time, and my wife hates it, but what could my attention to these particular photos is that they might actually be good- or at least composed well.

Like many things I wonder if I shouldn't have stuck with it, and really dove in deep as opposed to the absent minded dabbling I tend to do.

I think I never got over that leap from doing stuff that sucks to doing stuff that's awesome. I never got over my own super critical judgement. I avoid things I suck at, but when you start doing anything, you ARE going to suck at it.

Ugh.

I swear I'm not making excuses I'm just trying to figure out where I went wrong and what to do next.

The only thing I can figure is keep doing stuff.

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